Photo Credit: Lisa Berglund

As excited as I was, when I first entered the trial, and when I bought my plane ticket, and when I flew out, and when I landed, I had no clue what I was in for. I tried as best as my circumstances allowed to prepare for this but as much as I practiced precision, and depth perception exercises I don’t know that it would ever be enough. The level of handling isn’t something that this Idaho potato was used to and I still haven’t quite grasped.

Before I left, everyone was so excited to hear about what kind of trouble I’d get into when I was over there. I mean I was going to be in the most liberal country on the planet and be staying about an hour (give or take) from AMSTERDAM! This was a little scary because, lets face it, I know myself and I could easily have lost my mind in that city! However, when I was over there I chose not to explore Amsterdam because I wanted to spend the day taking Nell for extra long bike rides and getting caught up on rest. Jet lag is a real thing! Ricky suggests beer as an antidote, but there’s only so much beer in Holland!  So I had a couple peaceful days riding a bicycle through the country side in Holland and keeping my dog as fit as I could. I did take a day trip to Cologne, Germany but just went sight seeing and got a haircut.

Being surrounded by some of the best dog trainers and handlers in the world was pretty cool, I’m not gonna lie. Having them come up and tell me that I did a good job or that they liked my dog was even better! But the lessons that I learned will hopefully never be forgotten! So here’s a few of them:

Don’t get Bitter, just get BETTER!

After a couple of my runs at the Dutch open I was a little bummed that my scores didn’t reflect what I remember the runs to be. I thought my lines were fairly straight and the sheep had a decent pace around the field. Now my dog, who is used to having to push sheep, could have been softer and had a bit more precision initially but I thought that I had gotten a hold of her and we made a decent showing. It wasn’t until after one run that I thought I had one of the best runs of my life that I began to understand that they were looking for something a little more than what I was putting on the table. And I started to let that get to me. I was getting frustrated because I thought, according to my standards, that I was getting gypped on my scores. It wasn’t until a couple people who I have a lot of admiration for enlightened me that maybe what they were looking for was better than my best. Maybe, instead of letting some score or decision made my a stranger effect my mood I should just get better, not bitter. Now I didn’t expect to make much of an adjustment because there just wasn’t the time to do that. I might not get the subtleties that I’d inevitably need in order to be competitive over night. But, what I could do was go out and try my best and elevate my personal standards so that, no matter who was in the judge’s car, I’d come off feeling like I might have done something worth while. I had to accept that, at this level, the slightest deviation was too much and could easily take me out of the running. I worked really hard on keeping that in mind when I went out and ran at the Belgian open and although I still struggled a bit with my mental resilience, I ended up running one of the best runs of my life with one of the best scores I’ve ever gotten. A 109 out of 110. And all I could do was try and keep that mentality when heading to the Worlds the next day. It proved to, for the most part, work. I got third on my field getting me into the semifinal. And when I came off my run in the semi final, I accepted that even though I had a pretty good go of it, I probably wasn’t good enough to make it through this year. I was 17th in the semi’s and they took 16 into the final… I’m not gonna act like I was happy about this, but I wasn’t disappointed either. It was just the facts. But one thing was for sure, if I got bitter about my run, my score or anything else then I would have denied myself the opportunity to get better.

“Good Enough” NEVER is! 

In some parts of my life I’m a complete perfectionist. I’m not the cleanest person, as anyone who has ridden in my car would attest. And I have a hard time staying on time. Its just who I am, and according to Lady Gaga, I was BORN THIS WAY! And who can argue with Gaga? Go ahead… Try it… I dare you. But one area that I’ve always been neurotic about perfection is on the field with my dogs. Its actually brought some negative attention to me because it used to really effect my mood if I didn’t do well. But as I’ve grown and matured (to some extent… I mean I still, for the most part, act 12) I’ve just accepted that some days you’re not going to be the champion. BUT! That shouldn’t let you think that “good enough” is, well “good enough”.

The beauty about this sport is that perfection is nearly  impossible. I can always find a fault in any of my runs no matter how high the score is. I’ve run 100 out of 100 and I still found flaws in my run. I’ve run 109 out of 110 and found more than a point off. I think this isn’t the worst position to take because if we can always find flaws in our work, then we can always have something to work on. If we constantly tell ourselves that the run was “good enough” then what do we have to work on? Granted, not everyone wants to compete at the world championships but if we are to continue to elevate this sport then we’re going to have to elevate our standards with trials, running, breeding and training.

Respect Our Youth

One of the most refreshing things about the Worlds was how young so many of the handlers are. Worldwide the average age is much younger than it is here in the U.S. Over here its an expensive sport that requires a lot of financial commitment to partake in. Its a difficult hobby to be a part of because of how high entries are, how far we have to drive and how long we have to be away from work. Its also difficult over here because of the mentality towards younger people. I’m not going to play the “woe is me” card or anything but if I hadn’t been so determined and crazy about my dogs and this sport I would have dropped out long ago due to how difficult it was to gain respect from my fellow handlers.  Young people need to be encouraged to get involved and that starts with us. We have to encourage and educate. I was fortunate to have some great people that have, and continue to, help me out. People that never looked at me like the kid that I was (and still often act like), but rather they looked at me like a person that was serious about learning and passionate about these dogs, their history and their future. The people that accepted that I’d act my age and not theirs continue to be my mentors and my friends. This is how we need to embrace the youth of the sport and cultivate a future for North American sheep-dogging.

Celebrate Success, Even if it Isn’t Yours

Finally, I was so impressed so many people because of how they studied every run and every dog. No matter who was running the dogs on the field, if the run was good then people were excited because they got to see a good dog or a good handler or a good run. We, as humans, tend to have a lot of prejudice towards others. Particularly others who are competitive. But at the end of the day, if we judge other’s success or make excuses for why they are better than us, we deny ourselves the gift of getting better. This was hard for me. Years ago someone started a rumor about me which totally pissed me the hell off. I was ready to go for blood. And lets face it, if you’re going to piss someone off it shouldn’t be a gay-ginger-smartmouthed-hairdresser! I’ll cut you verbally and physically! Just kidding… sort of. But what changed my mind on my slanderous campaign was a friend pulling me aside and telling me to pull my head out of my ass. She said “this isn’t making him look bad, its making you look bad so let it go and be a good sport! People don’t talk about people who don’t threaten them!” And in the words of the infinitely wise and fabulous Ru Paul “Unless they payin your bills, pay dem bitches no mind”. Not to mention, this person is a good handler and I should have been watching their runs for the education. Get over your personal dislike and if someone does a good job then tell them. They deserved it. Once I did, I was able to forgive the rumors and learn to respect the man in front of me for how good he is at his passions.

All in all this trip taught me so much more than what I could possibly have written. Thank God this isn’t twitter because I can rarely keep a simple “hello” to 140 characters or less, let alone my rambling thoughts. But these are the things that continue to stick out for me. Now if I can just keep them up for me personally.

Good luck in the training field and much love to you all! Again I couldn’t have done this trip without you all supporting me from home!

I’ve been meaning to post for a few weeks but to be honest my mind has been so full of thoughts that I don’t know how I couple possibly have lined them all out. So be warned; this post could quite possibly be all over the damned place.

I got back to Washington right after the World Trialbut was exhausted! Then I started packing to move back to Idaho. So I took a break and Nell and I went on a little bike ride and it wiped me out! Seriously I don’t know how I’ll ever be a world traveler if I can’t get over jet lag faster! So I just went to bed. Besides, my thoughts are still so consumed with the Wolrd Trial that I doubt I’ll make much sense for quite a few days.

It was a dream I had years ago but never really thought seriously about going for until last fall when Joe Haynes pushed me to apply for the team. I’m glad he did. Now I can’t imagine missing one. I learned so much over there and had so much fun! Seriously half of the pictures taken between my friends and I will end up being some form of blackmail. Over here, I’m one of the youngest people in the sport which can get kind of lonely. There’s just a handful of us that are around my age and I rarely see them. When I was in Holland, the crowd I got to hang around with the most was all right around my age which a first for me. Not to mention, they are some of the most accomplished handlers in the U.K. with some of the best dogs that I’ve ever seen. Nothing against anyone else thats older than me (I was trying to find a different word than older but I haven’t had enough coffee yet so deal with it. Some people are older, some people are younger).

The level of handling and competition that I got to see was unreal! Handlers and dogs that I’ve only heard of or read about were in front of me. I’m not gonna lie, I was a bit of a fan girl when I saw Ricky Hutchinson run his famous Sweep. A dog that was later called “The best dog in the world” by another respected handler and shepherd. I was particularly interested because he’s the father of one of my young dogs and was curious about him on many levels. If it weren’t for an unlucky moment at the cross drive gate, he’d have made it through to the semifinal and I’m sure would have been dangerous. (Side note: Ricky and Sweep just won the English National for the second time and, partnered with his son, Jock, was English Brace Champion!)

At most trials you can look down the running order and have a good idea of who’s going to be dangerous. At this trial, IT WAS EVERYONE! Just because you didn’t know the handler or dog didn’t mean that they weren’t someone to be concerned about. I mean, HELLO!!! THEY MADE IT TO THE FREAKING WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS! That was a new sensation. My friend Tierney who moved to Ireland told me that its ridiculous because at ever trial she’s competing agains several international champions, national champions and people that at any time could become an international or national champion! As much as I respect my fellow competitors here, we don’t get that very often over here. Not that we don’t have good handlers! But its different when you’re running against people who have been competing at the best level in the world for decades. I’m still processing that part.

I’m having a hard time not dwelling on this trial. I wish every trial was like this one, with the camaraderie and the encouragement. I haven’t laughed this hard in years! (The beer tent had nothing to do with this) But I have to stay focused on my next trialling endeavor which is Soldier Hollow, The Meeker Classic and then the Nationals in Virginia. So I’m trying to switch gears and get my dogs and I ready for different sheep, higher elevations and the best competitors on the Continent.

Anyway, I have several posts in mind about my experiences there. But this one is more just to say thank you. Thank you to everyone who’s helped me get here. I hope you realize how much I appreciate you and I could never have done this without your help and encouragement. And thanks to my North American (Both U.S. and Canadian) members for always trying to see each other when possible and for being there after the running to say “good job”! It really made the experience extra special for me. I’ll be posting again soon! Much love to you all

I was a little worried yesterday to be honest. Since I’ve gotten to the Netherlands I haven’t really felt very nervous or anything. I’ve been on a nice few days of sight seeing, and sleeping. This jet lag is a real thing! I don’t know how Mariah does it, further proof that she is a super human and needs to be revered… But I haven’t really thought much about the upcoming trials other than to focus on getting my dog as prepared as I possibly can. Each morning/afternoon I’ve been taking her on bike rides through the various villages close to where I’m staying in Neerloon. Its a really cute little village with a nearby train station and shops in other close by villages. Like I said, its been a really nice couple of days.

Well that all changed last night. I drove to where the Dutch International Sheepdog Trials will be held so that I could sort of get my bearings straight and have a look at the fields, plus it was a chance to drop off some dog food, that Purina generously donated, to team members Beverly Lambert and Joe Haynes. Bev, Joe, Heather and I went out to dinner afterwards at a place I’m sure I’ll go to again. The food was great and the servers were cute. My two main criteria when choosing a delicatessen.

The fields were very pretty. Both looked like they could be part of the lawns of some great castle they were so green! Both are fairly flat with a little undulation here and there but nothing severe. Most of the ground here is pretty flat which makes it predictable to a point but also plays hell with my depth perception. We get two runs a day, one on each field and then a few people progress to the double lift final on Sunday afternoon. It should be a good time. The strange thing though is that I’m not competing against people that I’ve ever run against before in my life. Half of the people I’m running against I’ve only ever read their names in books or in ISDS magazines. Not that this scares me necessarily but it is a bit nostalgic.

So I got back to Francis’s place last night fully expecting to be exhausted and ready for a long hard sleep, and yet here I am at 4:30 after not sleeping for shit, blogging in the kitchen with 6 shots of espresso. This is surely going to add up to success! But at least it feels like my competitive side has finally landed on the continent!

Side note: At dinner last night we talked a lot about a lot of things, as people do. But one thing we all agreed on was how incredible the support for the world team has been this year. I don’t think that I’ve ever seen the community get so behind its team and we wanted to let everyone know that we greatly appreciate it!

Which leads me to my typical shameless self promotion. I can’t say what it means to me to have received so much personal support to help make this dream a reality. And I’m trying my best to bring everyone along with me, to see the gorgeous sights that I’m seeing and keep people updated on the latest news. If you’d like to contribute then please click SUPPORT DEREK’S NETHERLAND ADVENTURES

This week has had some pretty tough news for me personally. I spoke about it in a previous post and its had me really thinking. So, do me one favor; Today, RANDOMLY, do something kind for someone else. Don’t tell them that you’ve done it, just do something that will be sure to make someone else smile today. It might be as easy as sending someone a funny card or leaving a few flowers on someone’s desk at work. The world needs more kindness and love in it. I’ve felt it from you all since I began this journey back in November, so I know you all have a ton of love to give. Try, just for a day, to be the reason someone smiles.

As always, thank you for reading my ramblings! And Much Love to you all!

A year ago I made a pretty big decision. It’s had its negative and positive consequences, as any big decision does.  But in the end I’m happy with how it turned out. I was living in a toxic situation, or at least it was toxic for me. My exit undoubtedly hurt a few people, which was never the intention but we can’t be in control of everything in life. As much as we’d like to. For the record I hold no animosity to the situation I just talked about. For me it was a lesson in life that I won’t soon forget not just because of that particular situation that I put myself in, but for what made me run away from what I left. I might write more about this later, who knows. Its a long conversation that I’m still having with myself… thats right, I talk to myself… get over it.

I bring this up because it’s just funny how things work out. In about a week I’m going to be attending the biggest competition of of my life. A decision that I didn’t completely come to on my own. I had the idea to think about going. But it was my friend Joe Haynes who pushed me to make it a reality. He pushed me to apply to go, he pushed me to make a plan to help make it a reality (I’m terrible at planning so I doubt that a plan consisting of “prayers and miracles” is what he meant)  and it was he and Heather (Joe’s incredible wife) who have been so generous to me throughout this journey that I’ve been on over the last year. A year ago I left something that made me very unhappy and moved into a situation that was so much better for me because it generated growth, even though that growth was uncomfortable for me. But growth is always uncomfortable on some level.

I started wondering over the last few days how much we could accomplish if we held ourselves to the standards and possibilities that others see that we are capable of. No matter how well I do at whatever venue I’m working in, I always seem to have an inner doubt that something will go wrong. I try to maintain focus on what I’m supposed to do but, as anyone who knows me well will testify, my brain doesn’t “settle” very easily. I knew this a long time ago when I first started working dogs and getting into trialling. So I read a lot of sports psychology books and I practiced what the experienced authors taught me. Some of it worked but sometimes I think that it just takes someone sitting there telling me to pull my head out of my ass to really get through to me! At the end of the day, you can be educated, talented, skilled and practice your ass off and still fall flat. You can be none of the above and win the day. There’s just so many factors that can effect the day that it makes it a little difficult to completely prepare. However, for me, the most important part of doing my best at any competition is making sure that my journey up to the moment of truth is a fun one. I’ve always done my best when I am happy. Sometimes that means home life is great, or maybe its because of great times with friends that make the world seem a little better. But at the end of it all, an easy mind makes for a better journey.

This week, while I was writing this post, I received some news that’s had me pretty shook up. A friend of mine that I’ve known most of my life decided that it was time to end his own journey. I’ve always known him to have a bit of a shadow over his head but I’ve also never known someone so genuinely talented and creative that he would be put among the most gifted people I know. Unfortunately the demons he’s faced caught up to him and the worst has come. His end is approaching as I type this and it breaks my heart. I wish he had had the courage to walk away from the bad situations that he was in. I wish he could have let go of the people who made him miserable, and I wish that when I passed his house two weeks ago that I would have stopped in and said hello and told him that he’s loved. I can’t feel guilty for that because how was I to know? But I still wish it.

This journey to Europe has been something out of a story book for me. So many people have donated to my cause that its crazy and super humbling… thank you to everyone who’s helped get me here. There’s too many to name but I’ll say that I appreciate each and every one of you. No contribution, be it financial or moral support, has gone unnoticed. So far Europe is amazing and I can’t wait to explore a little more before I get into the thick of the competition.

This post has been a bit here and there and I get it but that’s where I am now. I am focused on what I’m here for but I also felt the need to address situations past and present. Because I felt that they had some congruency. I was unhappy a year ago so I changed my situation which led me to be in an incredible place surrounded by friends and supporters. My friend, who is currently lying in a hospital bed and basically gone from this world, decided to suffer through his pain and, as a result, is in his final moments on this Earth. I’m not trying to say I’m better than anyone, especially this friend of mine. I guess what I’m saying is that there’s good out there. If you’re in need then there are resources available to you. If you’re unhappy then change something. If these last few weeks have taught me anything its that life needs to be lived. I won’t say its too short because I don’t think its too short. I think that its only too short if we sit there thinking about what we’d like to do instead of going out and doing it! So… FFS go do it!

SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION:  If you’d like to donate to my gofundme account you can click this link Shameless self promotion

Thank you to everyone who has helped not only me, but also the US team as well. We all greatly appreciate it!

I’ll be posting more updates on my trip soon!